My Lord, you requested me to present a report on the warfare of the creatures of Darkness that are now known to be lurking on Your Lordship’s estate. After considerable consideration, I decided to describe the Battle of Dead Cat Peak, as well as I can remember it, hoping it might provide my Lord some insight in store for the upcoming purging of Your Lordship’s woodlands.
Upon the weather-beaten slopes of Dead Cat Peak lies a small dwarf mining community, whose name escapes my mind. It is surrounded by the rotting ruins of a once thriving human town, enveloped by the unwelcoming wilderness of the frozen steppes. Dread winds from the damned Wastes of the North often ravage the harsh landscape with their icy grip and on such nights the dwarf guardsmen keep their eyes keenly fixed on the amorphous darkness of that inhospitable area.
It was all in thanks to those watchful eyes that the Battle of Dead Cat Peak was not remembered as the Massacre of Dead Cat Peak, for foul beings indeed stalked the woods that night, invigorated by the vile touch of the winds of Chaos. I, a mere student at that time, was visiting the keep as a part of my education, and thus had the unfortunate chance to witness that terrifying night.
The deep call of the watchman’s horn stirred the lonely keep to life, waking us from our nocturnal slumber. Illuminated by torches and forges, stunted figures of my hosts hurried back and forth, arming themselves with the fine weaponry of their kin. I armed myself with my trusted pistol, in case the worst should happen. Below, the leering Chaos moon’s green-tinted light revealed huge, agile shapes leaping from shadow to shadow, resembling beasts. Closer examination through my spyglass told a more hideous tale: the creatures indeed had the qualities of beasts, but they were walking upright, armed with twisted weapons, bearing banners decorated with the ghastly symbols of the Four Gods of Chaos. That horrid image was burned into my memory and often still haunts my dreams.
My dwarf hosts shared my repulsion towards these monstrosities, but showed no fear. Their courageous determination helped me shrug off the heart-chilling terror and my scholarly nature prevailed. The thane of the keep – an ancient creature with enormous facial hair – would not allow me to take part in the defence force, so I ascended on the high walls of the mountain stronghold instead. From my bird’s eye view, I could survey the field of battle with my spyglass.
The Two Armies
I now proceed to describe the two forces as best as I can.
The dwarf force was based on the sturdy warriors of that ancient race. I calculated forty of them, arranged into two twenty dwarf strong formations, carrying banners and horns. The other was led the thane of the keep and the other was led by a runesmith – a bizarre mixture of a smith and a sorcerer (though the dwarfs are quick to deny the latter). On the hills stood ten dwarf crossbowmen, known as quarrellers in their own tongue. I could also spy a cannon fashioned in the resemblance a dragon and a multibarreled organ gun, both crewed by a busy group of dwarf gunners.
The bestial creatures had also emerged from the thick shades of the forest. My attention was first caught by three bull-headed giants I decided were minotaurs. They were accompanied by a smaller beast creature, clad in thick armour and leaning on a staff of purple stone. I later learned she was a sorceress, a shaman, and apparently the leader of the war band.
There were also two huge chariots, pulled by fierce steeds that mocked the natural order of the gods. I saw human figures in both chariots. Both seemed to contain a man dressed in tattered remains of the uniform of the Bright College. Hate flashed through my very soul. These were not barbarians, but men of the Empire! Two mages, sanctioned by the Emperor himself, and then betraying his noble trust!
I gathered myself, forcing the hateful thoughts off my mind and returned to study the ranks of the enemy of mankind. I noticed a group of five huge war hounds – or perhaps some tainted felines from the northern steppes. These beasts snarled and circled around, eager to be unleashed upon the enemy. Suddenly, the earth moved and to my horror, two twin-headed spawns of Chaos erupted from the soil. They had the head of a lion and that of a goat and their tails were serpents – the other’s in likeness of a cobra and the other’s a flayed viper, skinless muscles glistening in the moonlight. Later, I learned these chimerical creatures are sometimes known as Fiends of Slaanesh.
This, as far as I could tell, was the Chaos war band. Bellowing fiercely the creatures started charging across the battlefield and the Battle of the Dead Cat Peak had begun!
The First Hour of the Battle
As the horrible army of the night rolled towards the dwarf lines, I noticed the two renegade Bright Wizards had begun flailing and chanting in their moving chariots. Red and white flames danced around them, as they called forth the winds of magic. A huge ball of liquid fire, the size of a millstone, uncurled itself out of the other mage’s index finger – I shall call him White Wizard in lack of a better name from now on. The fiery blast flew sizzling through the air, burning grass and roots in its wake. I covered my eyes, to not to witness the incoming mayhem, but instead the screams and stench of combusting flesh, there was nothing. I peered through my spyglass and noticed the runes on the runesmith’s vestments were glowing. The dwarf magus had clearly disrupted the magical phenomenon.
The second rogue Bright Wizard – let us know him as the Red Wizard – was even more unfortunate than his chariot-mounted colleague. He was conjuring up a ghastly skull of pure fire, but he lost control and the skull flew cackling to the sky, exploding in a shower of sparks, like an Emperor’s day firework. White Wizard had recovered himself and was now throwing smaller cannonball-sized fireballs at the crossbowmen on the hills. I was delighted to see the dwarfs endure the petty flames with ease.
My attention was now turned to the shaman, who was moving her paws – for those surely were no hands – in monotonous patterns. Shadows around her started pooling together and took the shape of a stag. The unearthly steed soon dissipated, for the runesmith’s runes were ablaze again.
Now it was the dwarfs’ turn to demonstrate their destructive might. The dragon-muzzled gun had been carefully prepared by the gunners, and through my spyglass I saw a venerable veteran lighting the fuse. With a deafening thunder, the cannon fired straight at the chariot of the White Wizard. The cannonball, encrusted with dwarf runework, hit the hull of the chariot, but that diabolical device, forged by Chaos, only shook a little. I saw the look of surprise on the faces of the dwarf gunners – I would have thought the perfect O’s of their mouths comical, unless my lips hadn’t been the very same shape.
The quarrellers shot a volley at the minotaurs, but the beasts took the shots unbothered, bellowing a snorting laughter. Their merriment was cut short, as the fierce organ gun opened fire. The small lead balls tore into the hides of these beasts, making them howl in agony. I could not help cheering, as I noticed the shaman was limping her left leg.
The Second Hour of the Battle
The wounded shaman took out a weird, twisted horn and brought it on her lips. The resonating sound of the horn made me ill. Far away in the distance, I saw distant torches. She was calling for reinforcements! Suddenly the thickest behind the gunners moved and ten mutated creatures leaped out. Some had horns and the legs of woodlands beasts, some tentacles of the octopi of the south. They were the stuff of nightmares.
The dwarfs were now under attack from both sides. The leaping feline war beasts engaged the dwarf warriors led by the runesmith and the spellcasters begun their infernal work again.
Both of the Bright Wizards seemed to be in trouble, flames popping around them, like Cathayan firecrackers. The shaman, clearly intimidated by the organ gun, retried to summon her stag-like shadow steed. Noticing this, the runesmith snatched a rune-covered stone from his belt and held it high in the air. The shadowy essence of the stag was drained into the stone in a spectacular purple whirlwind. Cheering, the dwarfs fought with much vigour and killed two of the five attacking hounds. The remaining three beasts turned tail and fled.
The tide of battle was now clearly in the hands of the dwarfs and bellowing their harsh war cries they charged the beastman ranks, runesmith leading the charge on the minotaurs and the thane and his warriors attacking one of the Chaos Spawns.
The artillery turned its attention on the unengaged troops. I saw the cannon with the long-bearded veteran gunner taking aim at the chariot of the White Wizard again. It fired, belching smoke and fire, and this time the cannonball shred through the two Chaos horses pulling the vehicle. The chariot swung like the arm of a catapult, throwing the Bright Wizard high in the air, arms and legs flailing wildly. The sorcerer hit the ground and went limp.
The unengaged spawn was closing on the quarrellers on the hill. They shot at the monster with dwarf accuracy, but the beast could not be slowed down. The organ gun was pivoted at the ten ambushing beastmen and cut down five of them, turning the pitiful creatures into bloody mess.
I saw the thane himself cutting the dreadful spawn down and one of the runesmith’s lot mortally wound a minotaur weakened by the organ gun. The dwarfs banged their shields, delighted with their victories.
The Third Hour of the Battle
The surviving Chaos Spawn tore into the quarrellers, heads snapping at all directions. The Red Wizard drove straight into the warriors of the thane, warhorses trampling with their hooves. The five surviving mutants charged the cannon and its crew.
The White Wizard seemed to have survived his impact with the ground, for he was back on his feet, conjuring a massive wheel of fire. The runesmith, still fighting the fierce minotaurs, managed to disrupt the winds of Chaos again. Enraged, the sorcerer threw a ball of fire at the organ gun, but the infernal flame only coloured the gun’s muzzles red for a moment. The shaman fought to escape the combat with a shadowy steed. With the runesmith so close to her, she had no chance of success.
The five charging beastmen cut the dwarf gunners down and ran over the cannon, flanking the crossbowmen. The dwarfs held, though, and cut down a mutant. Disheartened, the four remaining beasts fled. The Red Wizard, clearly not pleased with the little damage his chariot charge had caused, turned his vehicle around and fled. The dwarfs attempted to pursuit, but were easily outrun by the chariot.
A blue-skinned minotaur cut the runesmith in two with his huge sabre. Albeit this victory, the dwarfs still outnumbered them and were now enraged to a killing frenzy by their loss. The shaman urged the minotaurs to retreat and with bovine strength, the two remaining giants were soon out of the reach of the short-legged dwarfs.
It was as if the fruitless efforts of the White Wizard had paid off, for when the organ gun was pivoted at the direction of the lone mage, only smoke came out. I saw a red-nosed gunner jump up and down and tear his beard.
The quarrellers showed exceptional spirit yet again, managing to hack down the Chaos Spawn with their axes.
The Fourth Hour of the Battle
After gaining some distance to their pursuers the minotaurs and the Red Wizard turned to face the dwarfs again. The shaman cast some sinister shadowy spell that sucked two warriors through the solid ground, never to be seen again. The White Wizard threw a fiery blast, unopposed as the runesmith was dead, and the liquid fire burned two crossbowmen to ash in a blink of an eye.
The organ gun attempted to kill the murderous mage, but the mechanisms seemed to be jammed.
The Fifth Hour of the Battle
Ten more beastmen lurked out from the ruins and with his new allies, the Red Wizard charged again into the warriors of the thane. The minotaurs and the shaman joined the slaughter, charging their pursuers.
The White Wizard attempted to cast something, but lost the control of the winds of Chaos. He screamed hideously and exploded like a barrel of gunpowder catching fire.
The minotaurs, now with full momentum of their charge, cut through the remnants of the runesmith’s warriors, turning to feast on the dead. I quickly looked away. Your Lordship must take notice, that minotaurs seem to lust for blood with such passion, that they are willing to stop and gorge even in the midst of a battle – this could be a useful piece of information.
The beastman and the Red Wizard fought ferociously, but could not break the lines of the heavily armoured dwarf warriors. Demoralised, they fled into the night.
The Sixth and Final Hour of the Battle
Once more the Red Wizard as well as the fleeing beastmen rallied. Up on the hills, the few surviving beastmen of the other ambushing herd charged back at the quarrellers. The shaman hid to the depths of the forest and her minotaur bodyguards turned to face the dwarf warriors.
The Red Wizard threw a fireball at the warriors of the thane, setting them ablaze. Winds brought the stench of burning flesh to my nostrils. I gagged.
I took a look at the quarrellers. They were, to my pleasure, hacking down the few beastman that had charged them.
The thane and his warriors hacked down the other herd of beastmen and mutants and the battle was over.
The Red Wizard in his chariot, the shaman and the two minotaurs were the only Chaos creatures to survive and they quietly retreated. But it was no victory for the dwarfs either – they had lost over a half of their troops. It was a simultaneous defeat, a draw, if Your Lordship pleases. A classic example of the madness that is war. Only winners that day were the crows and the maggots.
Your trusted servant
Heinrich Stolz
Appendix
Armylists:
Dwarfs
Thane
+Master rune of Gromril
+Great Weapon
Runesmith
+Shield
+Rune of Spell Breaking
+Rune of Spell Breaking
20 Warriors
+Full Command
+Shields
20 Warriors
+Full Command
+Shields
10 Quarrellers
+Shields
+Musician
Cannon
+Rune of Forging
Organ Gun
Beastmen
Bray Shaman
+Chaos Armour
+Braystaff
+Spell familiar
+Level
*general
*Mark of Chaos Undivided
*Lore of Shadows
Chaos Sorcerer
+Level
*Mark of Chaos Undivided
*Lore of Fire
*Mounted in a chariot
Chaos Sorcerer
+Level
*Mark of Chaos Undivided
*Lore of Fire
*Mounted in a chariot
Beast Herd
*5 Gors
*5 Ungors
+Full Command
*Ambush
Beast Herd
*5 Gors
*5 Ungors
+Foe-Render
+Musician
*Ambush
5 Beastmen Warhounds
3 Minotaurs
+Bloodkine
Chariot of Chaos
*Mark of Chaos Undivided
Chariot of Chaos
*Mark of Chaos Undivided
Fiend of Slaanesh
Fiend of Slaanesh
Deployment Diagram
Dwarfs:
1. Organ gun
2. Warriors and thane
3. Warriors and runesmith
4. Cannon
5. Quarrelers
Beasts:
1. Spawn
2. Chariot with “Red Wizard”
3. Warhounds
4. Minotaurs with shaman
5. Chariot with “White Wizard”
6. Spawn
